Day 44

Ok, so it's the end of day 2 of step 3......I'm just happy to be done with step 2, I think I was going to throw up if I had to take one more of those pills....I can handle the initial 5 minutes of stomach pain, but if I didn't constantly drink water I felt like I almost had heart burn, like it was going to crawl back up my throat....nasty...and I just couldn't get that after taste out of my mouth. bleh, ew, gross! My off day was really nice, I still had the nasty taste, but not having to take anything was great. Unfortunately I had to go someplace public on my day 1 of step 3 so I had to take in sitting in a car....well needless to say I got some of the minerals on my BRAND NEW black capris and the minerals left orange bleach like spots on them. ARG!!!!!! luckily I could always go buy another pair, but I'm going to see if I can get some dye and dye it back. So frustrating. As if it doesn't suck enough that I have to take this stuff but I accidentally ruined my brand new capris.....otherwise it's been pretty easy to take, it does smell nasty. The other two steps didn't really have a smell but this one is potent. It's a very minimal amount that you take and mix with water or juice at first. Then you up your dose every 2 days, so it's like a much faster version on step 1. I actually feel pretty good today. I think I'm having an outbreak, I saw a few spots today but they don't hurt at all and they are pretty small so I guess I'll see what happens. Maybe they are just clearing symptoms. My warts have gotten bigger but I was told that that I could use step 3 topically. So I tried that today and it did burn, kind of a mild version of having them froze off. I hope it works. Not sure how often I'm supposed to treat it though, I guess that's something else I'll keep my eye on. It's really too soon to say ow this will effect me though, It usually takes a few days for me to really start feeling like crap. I got a sunburn yesterday so that kind of makes me tired, but really I've been feeling pretty good today and yesterday. I only have to take step 3 twice a day so it doesn't seem all consuming of my day.... The worst part is having to wait the 3 minutes when you mix it. It makes it harder to be inconspicuous when taking it.....Tomorrow will be my first day having to take this stuff at work, I'm sure it will be fine though. The weather has been really nice and I think that's really helped my mood. I have been soooo moody through all this, like PMS. I have had some insane rage today. It doesn't help that all my clothes are in a giant pile but I have just been so quick to snap today. I'm totally not like this usually. I can't wait to be off this stuff so I can be back to normal.....I feel really good today, aside from being tired with the sunburn.......maybe this stuff is actually working. They said that sometimes by step 3 you feel like the virus has left your body and you feel good. I still have some itching down there, but using this stuff topically will hopefully take care of that and I'll be good to go.....12 more days and that's it...I may do the extension depending on if the warts go away. I'm due for a PAP this month (june) so we will see, if the warts aren't gone I'm sure they will want to treat them, which would probably be ok. Except my insurance gets billed. oh well......still haven't found anyone I'm interested in really. I actually did find one guy, he has the body type I like, I don't really know him at all but when I see him I'm like mmmm...mmmmm..mmmmm.........kind of makes me feel better but I wish I could find love....and a guy with a body like that...lol.....well I gotta hit the sack soon.....So new symptoms

step 2: nasty taste in mouth
stomach pain
"heartburn"
nausea (very slight but couldn't be cured by the apple)
fatigue
pimples

step 3: acne on back now, large pimples on neck too
sensitivity to the sunlight (through all three stages)


but on the bright side I'm starting to feel better
Well my birthday is saturday and I'm kind of stoked.....so all is pretty good....hope day 3 goes well too, I up my dose tomorrow.
Step 3 is a little weird because you have a dropper bottle and then another bottle that looks like a small version of step 1 and you put in 2 drops which is practically nothing and then 1 ml of the other stuff and let it sit for 3 minutes. Tomorrow it goes up to 4 drops and 1ml...and so on.....well that's how it goes, so still hoping for the best, and hoping this is the easiest step cuz the first 2 were kind of a doozy...well goodnight, talk to you later

Day 40

Well I'm on day 6 of step 2. Tomorrow is my last day with these pills and I can't wait!!!! to not have to take them.....I feel like I want to throw up all the time, bleh.....I'm so tired, I haven't been sleeping well at all, having dreams about screwing up this detox...I always have a sick taste in my mouth too...not fun!!!!!!!! I need a nap. Well, I don't really have anything important to say today, other then feeling overall crappy and tired step 2 hasn't been that bag....almost triggers my gag reflex though.....Well tomorrow is the end of step 2 and friday is my off day before starting step 3.......should have 8 days to go, but actually have 16 in all.....more to come later I guess

Day 38

Happy Memorial Day!....so far mine's sucked. My cat was totally insane last night and would not let me sleep. Not to mention for whatever reason these step 2 pills have left and absolutely disgusting taste in my mouth and throat. Part of that was the reason I didn't sleep last night. Now I'm really irritable and don't have any tolerance for peoples' BS. Probably with the mix of being intoxicated by cigarettes and just not having enough water I feel like super crap and my skin is breaking out in pimples again. Just when you think you're done with that phase, you're not. I can't wait till I don't have to take this crap anymore, I just want to feel good and like the rest of the world isn't out to disappoint me, cuz that's exactly what life is right now. Being put on the back burned constantly... I think I might order a pizza or something, for the past several days I've maintained the same weight, and for whatever reason I gained 4 pounds. I'm planning a huge diet plan after I"m done with the detox anyway, so I might as well eat what I want right now, it seems to be the only pleasure I have right now.....well I'm going to go order something, I have a gross taste in my mouth....

Day 37

Well, today was day 3 of step 2....the pimples have kicked into high gear. The sucky part is that they are the big deep kind, but what's worse is that you can't pop them and it's almost like they just harden and stay there, not like they really heal and go away. Hopefully after time they will, but pimples in general are just obnoxious. I stayed at a friends the other day and the mix between not drinking enough water and the cigarette smoke didn't exactly make me feel very good. It's kind of funny cuz there is caffeine and a bunch of stuff in these pills but I'm been more tired than anything, wanting to sleep 12 hours at a time. My lymphnodes aren't as sore as they were. I've had cysts in my armpits for many years that were apparently inflammed sweat glands, when they get clogged they swell....anyway, I haven't had one in a couple years and having been on this detox flared it up again, that's probably been the most painful. You can tell there is a cyst in there and there is an open pore that you could essentially pop it, which is gross I know....but it's been too painful to attempt it. Anyway, still as unpleasant it is to have to take this stuff, which really kind of leaves a nasty taste in your mouth after awhile. Then again, brushing your teeth more frequently really isn't a bad thing. It's easier to carry around a bottle of bills then a bag of 3 bottles or liquid. Less inconspicuous too. The key really is to eat enough and then drink plenty afterward. I just took my dinner dose and only had a small amount of food....had the stomach pain for a few minutes, but ate an apple and I'm feeling ok...drank more water too, I think I was pretty dehydrated earlier so I need to catch up on my daily water intake. Don't you just hate feeling sick and then feeling like you're stuck at home. When really you don't want to go anywhere cuz you don't feel good.......almost makes you feel worse. The runny nose is starting to kick in a little more. I haven't really had a problem with it other than if I have my head down for awhile, but randomly one nostril will get kind of drippy. It's not really the kind of runny nose that would lead you to have to blow it. You moreso have to stick the tissue up there and absorb the moisture.....kind of annoying....this whole process is annoying, that goes without saying....The weather has been pretty nice lately and I went to the lake and just sat and enjoyed the sun and the cool breeze. It was just what I have been needing for all the anxiety I've been experiencing.....I'm going to make a point to get out and enjoy nature more....We are all vitamin D defficient anyway. It doesn't help that I've been super hormonal this week too......anyway, things are going ok, 4 more days on step 2. This up coming thursday will be the last day, friday will be my day off and saturday I'll start step 3, which is good cuz who knows how I'll react to that, and it's all complicated having to mix drops and let it sit for 3 minutes..I don't know....anyway, I hope this blog is helpful to people, I'm pretty positive about getting rid of the HSV, I really hope this gets rid of the HPV too, cuz that's mostly what's annoying, the itching and warts....so inconvenient......still have high hopes. Taking this stuff everyday seems like second nature now, it's going to be weird when I don't have to take it anymore. I think this has really taught me how to be better about taking things daily, like my vitamins once this is all over..... but one of the people who tested negative said to do as much to boost your immune system when you're done taking the detox so you can make sure it will flush it out of your system. I'm looking forward to having energy again.. well that's enough for today, I'm tired...

Day 35

Well today was day 1 of step 2. So it's 2 pills 3 times a day with/after food. So I heard some bad things about the pills that they make your stomach hurt and all that jazz. So I was determined not to let it get to me, so I got plenty of sleep last night and this morning made myself breakfast. I cut up and apple, and set out a glass of water and a glass of apple juice. I ate a cup of granola almond cereal and made 3 scrambled eggs. Ate the cereal and half of the eggs and took the first pill, drank half the water and half the juice. Finished the eggs and took the second pill, drank the rest of the juice and water, then ate an apple....Then I had that full stomach feeling from drinking so much...lol..go figure, and the stomach pain lasted about five minutes but it was very mild so I just sat down and took some deep breaths and then I was fine. I had the same really minor stomach pain after lunch and after dinner I was fine...I think making sure to eat enough and drinking plenty is definately the key....but don't let the pills sit in your mouth cuz it starts to taste like chlorine...bleh. Anyway...so far so good for day 1 of step 2....aside from other life drama things are good.....I've just had a huge financial burden thrown at me so it's going to be tight and stressful within the next few months.....and my birthday is coming up and it just seems like everyone is willing to get together but only if I plan it myself. all my friends are married with kids but me and I always get put on the back burner because everyone has a family, so now I feel stressed and unloved......I just feel really crappy. I'm tired of having a medeocre life. I started talking to this guy and I realized that I'm really pissed at guys.....I feel like I can't trust them. Just when you think you can, they give you STD's. They lie, cheat and steal to get what they want and I feel totally betrayed by people.....I'm a people person, I need to have relationships and I need to be able to care about others, and I feel like I can't and it makes me really sad. Now I'm going to be another year older and I'm going to feel the same way about the same crap....and it's just another year that my life plan is slipping away. I should be married already, or at least know who I'm going to marry.....but no, I have no one, I'm alone. And I'll continue to be alone cuz now I don't know how to have a relationship with people that doesn't involve being angry and hurt and scared.....Having STD's is like being raped..Not that I've been raped, but you have the fear of, who did this to me, why me, will I ever be able to trust again, will the physical and emotional scars ever heal......will I be able to have a normal relationship....and the secrecy of not being able to tell anyone. How did I get here? .....man, I'm on the last day of my period and it's been a roller coaster, I've been insanely irritable and today I'm really emotional......I hate being a girl

Day 33- Goodbye Step1

Ok, so it's FINALLY my last day of step 1, for real this time....What was supposed to be 25 days turned into 33. The strange part is that most of the time I barely felt the effects of it. As of yesterday though I've had this strong pain in the back of my right leg. For anyone who has HSV, this is a familiar feeling. I got it a lot more frequently before and right after I found out I was positive. Haven't really had the problem since but I think because I'm at the end of the these bottles and there are lingering minerals down there (that taste super gross and strong) it's probably really kicking in. I kind of feel all gimpy though cuz the back of my knee to my butt hurts. Oh well, the pain is worth it if it'll eventually go away... I've also had a lingering head ache, just enough for it to be annoying and make you want to take a nap...I have been pretty tired the past few days too. Not to mention it's that time of the month again and the hormones are raging.....and I really mean "RAGE-ing" I have been so irritable I'm annoying myself....anyway, only a few more days and hopefully things will calm down. I'm ready for step 2 and whatever it brings. I anticipated that I would be good for nothing throughout this detox and although I feel like I'm wasting my life away, I have hope of the over abundance of energy and overall well being when this is all over. I've been contributing to some really great hubs of people who are all doing the detox right now and it's been really encouraging. We are the next generation of a cure for this heinously obnoxious virus.....So it's only 11:30 ish and I actually haven't taken my dose today as I finished bottle A yesterday and will finish bottles B and C with my lunch and dinner, but as step 1 comes to an end, here are the symptoms I've experiences overall...

-burst of energy (first day)
-diarrhea (first day only)
-fatigue (throughout)
-bad taste in my mouth
-swollen tonsils which white spots
-102 temperature
-nausea (vomiting from high fever and nausea-only once) ibuprofin did the trick
-very minor runny nose (only when I tilt my head down)
-minor headache
-skin sensitivity
-pimples (mainly in armpits and on legs-small ones on face)
-sore lymphnodes in armpits
-leg pain
-minor outbreak
-increase in warts (HPV)
-vaginal itching
-feeling of severe dehyration

Things that helped:
-mixing dose with juice and drinking at least a full glass of water afterward
-eating an apple afterward
-ibuprofin
-getting plenty of rest


although that may seem like a lot of symptoms, it's all worth it if this works. Other than the fever, everything has seemed to be pretty minor...make sure to listen to your body and take it easy...tomorrow is my "off day" and friday I start step 2....so far so good...and still hoping for the best

Good News

So I e-mailed the resolve team and they told me that when I get to step 3 I can use it topically on the warts. This is going to save me so much money on treatments. So that solves my problem of whether to get the wartrol or have them removed, I don't have to spend any money at all...I don't really understand what they said about mixing step 3 but it's good news that however you mix it, it works...yay! Oh and for those of you who are skeptical I have been contributing to a hub if you google Resolve Herpes Hub it's called back to health minerals, illness...something....anyway, there have been several people who have finished resolve and tested NEGATIVE!!!!! Now that I'm almost finished with step one, I'm really optimistic that steps 2 and 3 will really do the trick.....Yay for good news!

Day 32

So I took my last dose of Bottle A today and it was NASTY!!!!! all of those leftover minerals at the bottle, so gross. But I am done with my morning dose, YAY!!!! now I just have my lunch and dinner doses today and tomorrow and I'll be home free.....I've been feeling kind of tired lately. Also, Aunt Flo is in town and I am PISSY!!!! It sucks because I met this guy and for whatever reason I trusted him enough to tell him about my condition and he was really respectful about it...then I was talking to him last night and he fell asleep while I was talking to him which is one of my BIGGEST PET PEEVES....I was so pissed off. Now I can't get over it........I'm so done with feeling like I'm not important. I so don't want a boyfriend right now, I can't tolerate their BS. Maybe I'm just be super hormonal or something, I don't know but every guy I see I just want to slap them. I was looking at a friend of mine's myspace...you know the one who I was seeing who said he only wanted sex? well we still hang out and stuff and last monday we had a really fun time together. Then I see these comments on his myspace about how he's done with relationships and how do you ask a girl to be friends with benefits? Is he talking about me????? or does he have like five other girls on the side? I can't stand that...the whole thing makes me want to throw up.......arg....I think I need a vacation...I need some sun and I need to just get away.....everytime I take my detox my heart starts racing....I feel the anxiety start to build...I think I'm going to explode....I think I just need to feel like I'm making progress and right now I just feel so stuck and unhappy like I can't breathe.......I only have 2 1/2 more hours of work.....I gotta get out of here......off to take me lunch dose....one more day baby, one more day

Day 31...ARG!!!

So I took my lunch dose today and then measured out how much i had left and it was more then 15ml! I know there is even more in my evening dose bottle. So I e-mailed the resolve team and asked them if I should take it an additional day even though I won't have anymore of bottle A and they e-mailed me back and told me to finish all of step 1! ARG! that means I have to take it an ADDITIONAL day which means I'll be done Wednesday, have thursday off and start the pills on Friday...This is so annoying... It's taking me ten million years to finish step 1. This better work and be worth all this postponing and adding days and bla bla bla.......I'm frustrated and I feel like I'm starting to perspire this detox cuz I can smell it and I don't know where it's coming from....super annoying!

Day 31...continued

So I just took my morning dose and I measured out how much was left over after I took it and it was exactly 15ml....damn it! lol....that means I have one more day of this stuff after today. I'll have to take larger lunch and dinner doses to finish off the other two bottles....this stuff is never ending....ARG! At least I know FOR SURE...tomorrow is my last day of step 1, wednesday is my off day and I'll start step 2 on Thursday...I sure hope this stuff works..

Day 31

Alright, well I said I was going to be finished with step 1 yesterday but I guess there was more then 15ml worth of stuff in the bottles so I'm hoping today will be the last day. I have the least amount of my morning dose, then a little more in my afternoon dose and the most in my evening dose....I guess depending on how much is left after I take my 15ml today I may just take the rest of it. Seems kind of dumb to take a really small dose tomorrow, plus since this is only the second day of taking 15ml, it probably wouldn't hurt to take a higher dose. I'm eager to move forward with step 2. I really hope it doesn't upset my stomach. I guess I'll have to my breakfast really early on wednesday and take the pills at home to see how I react. I heard the cramping is pretty bad like 3 minutes or so after you take it the first time. If I keep up on my water intake I should be ok....
I've come to grips with the fact that I can't rush this process. I really wanted to be done by my birthday in June, but that's not going to happen. Lately I've been pretty itchy down there and the warts have gotten worse, so I can tell the virus is being pushed out, but warts take forever to get rid of. I'm not really sure what the best thing to do about that is. Also what the least expensive thing to do is. Everytime I have them removed I get billed like $70 that my insurance doesn't cover. I was thinking of getting some wartrol since it's all natural but they say you have to use it until they are gone and I can only afford a months worth at this point. So do I pay the $20 copay and be billed the $70 to have them removed or pay $50 for the wartrol and see how well that works....I guess being billed isn't the worst thing in the world. I think I'll try the wartrol for the external symptoms and hopefully the detox will handle everything internally. Otherwise I've been doing good, still tired at times, I haven't really gotten much accomplished lately. According to another hub I contribute to, there was a lady who did resolve and was cured. She said to make sure to listen to your body. Don't over do it and when your body says you are tired, sleep......so I guess I can justify my laziness for trying to take care of my body and what it's going through right now... I'm just ready to be done with step 1.....well keep your fingers crossed that I can get it done today....if so, tomorrow will be my off day and I will let you know how step 2 goes come wednesday.

Day 28

So the time is just flying by now......so things fell through with the reality tv show...I should be on a plane to LA if I was going to be on it....guess the HSV and HPV weren't ok with them. I figured as much. It's all good though, I think I would have been shocked if they said it was ok. Hollywood isn't so understanding about those things...but I wouldn't have been done with my detox by then anyway.....So keep a look out this summer for a show called "More to Love" and you can think of me and say "she didn't get on the show cuz those lame people don't accept the misfortune of std's" but I assure you, however heavy the people on that show are, I'm only a size 10 so don't think I'm super huge or anything when the show airs, cuz there may be some plus size people on there....Anyway...I'm just eager to finish this detox. I should be done with step 1 on sunday. Today is friday and I'm still on 13ml. Tomorrow is my last day of 13 and then I'll take 15 on sunday which will empty the bottles. Yay!. Then monday is my day off and Tuesday I'll start step 2. Since the fevers been gone it's been smooth sailing. My heart rate seems to increase right after I take the dose which leaves me feeling winded and almost like I have heart burn. I haven't really had any runny nose though and they said that was a big symptom. My nose will run if I put my head down, but on a normal bases I don't really have to wipe it at all. I wonder if step 2 will bring that on. Also, most of the pimples have gone away, my face is still a little bumpy but its' more in texture than you can tell I have pimples. I still get a few in my hairline and stuff but my legs have pretty much cleared up.

I was pretty itchy down there this morning when I woke up which I hope is a good sign. Since I haven't had any symptoms recently I'm wondering if the whole fever could have been avoided had I not tried to diet while I was taking it. I think food and plenty of water really are the key. Anyway....things are good, life is good and it's friday and sunny, so I really can't complain. Hope everyone is doing well. I'll let you know how step 2 goes......keep your fingers crossed

Day 26

Well it's day 26 and it should be my off day. Step 1 was only supposed to take 25 days and then you get an off day and I should be onto step 2 tomorrow but the resolve team told me to finish step 1. Since I had the fever I had to take low doses for a few days. I'm back up to 13ml, it's day 2 and I'm feeling fine. The fever is gone, I'm sleeping good, my back pain is gone....things are looking up. Still having pimples here and there and a pain in my arms. I think it's swollen lymphnodes which the resolve team said is normal. Breast cancer runs in my family and although I'm young, I'm praying that this pain is just from the detox. I have found some lumps but I think they are the swollen lymphnodes because they hurt when I touch them. It kind of comes and goes...so we will see, if when i'm done with this, it doesn't go away I'll go get an ultra sound. I've had sore lymphnodes before, it was actually from tanning, weird huh...Anyway, i'm aware of it....My breathing is better, I feel like I can take deeper breaths but it seems like right after I take my dose my heart starts racing.... On a separate note, I keep getting calls from this reality dating show and they want me to be on it. They might want me to fly to LA on friday for a few days to be interviewed. I told them straight out I had HPV and HSV1 and that if that disqualifies me, they need to tell me now before I just leave work for the day to go to LA. Plus taping starts in like a week and a half and that's REALLY fast. not to mention I don't get paid while I'm there, so how will I pay my rent? I've just been having these internal battles with myself on what the right thing to do is. Not to mention I'll still be on the detox the entire time. With having had the fever, the next 2 steps could be a breeze or could kick my butt even more, that's no fun....but I also don't want to go on this show and be portrayed in a negative light. I guess I still haven't decided what I want to do. I'm still waiting on the call saying whether the STD's are ok or not. If they say no I think I might be relieved...if they say yes, I think I'll be shocked out of my mind. I may go to LA to check it out and depending on how I feel when I get there will determine what I do next....either way I'm just glad to not be feeling sick...I hope all goes well and I can clear this thing from my system. The HPV is the real kicker. I still have warts and was debating on whether I should go in to get them removed or wait till next month and get the wartrol. If I go to LA I won't have the money, I would just have to get them removed...I don't know, I feel stressed and that's not good. I haven't gotten a ton of sleep either and that can't be good. Anyway....things are going well, finally over what I feel to be the hump.. for now anyway....well I'll write more later...hope everyone is doing well and feeling encouraged about this possible cure.....Happy Hump Day!!!! ;)

Heartbroken and Alone

So for whatever reason I've been missing me EX BAD! I don't know why, it's been almost 2 years since we broke up, but I never stopped loving him. I do want the best for him but part of me wants the best for him with Me. The only thing is I don't know if he will ever know how to be what I need, which in the end will just make me unhappy. In the mean time I keep having all these dreams about him, and my heart just aches to hold him in my arms....He doesn't know about all this stuff I've been going through, I haven't even seen or talked to him in months. So Idon't know why all of a sudden now I just wished I had his loving support. I have no one. I'm all alone, and although I have friends to support me, it just doesn't seem like enough. Ugh! I haven't cried or anything about this but I sure feel like I'm on the brink.....I've been doing better health wise, today is day 2 of being back up to 10ml. Tomorrow I'm going to move to 13. Technically it's day 24 and if I was on track then tomorrow would have been my last day of step 1....but noooo I had to get that stupid fever and ruin everything....I just need to feel loved right now....if I knew some one loved me for me I think I would be so much better. I sent in a video for that dating show and I think it made me realize that I'm not where I want to be weight wise....I mean that camera adds ten pounds but I don't need ten more, I need 25 less....and I won't be able to pursue that for awhile....These questions I had to answer for the audition were like "has your weight ever affected a relationship?" "do you feel your weight has kept you from having relationship opportunities?" I never thought it did, but maybe it might. Maybe these guys who like me for 2 weeks then move on are thinking I'm not the arm candy they are looking for. It's all about being comfortable in your own skin and I just don't feel like I'm there.....I have had SOOO many stresses in the last six months...things have been pretty good, I'm just over all this. I want to live a normal life again....=(

Day 23

Today was pretty good. It was the first day I upped my dose to 10ml.....something I have found that helps with my fever is that if I go to bed with my hair wet, I wake up with a normal temperature, I guess it helps to keep the heat down in my head....strange, but it works... I did fight a little bit of a temperature today but that's to be expected with me upping my dose. I'm going to do another day of 10ml and then go up to 13ml.....I'm hoping it won't be too bad. I'm finally down to a little less than half a bottle of each step. It feels good actually being able to see it get less and less, I feel like I've been taking this forever...It's been three weeks and two days since I started this....my outbreak I had cleared up but my warts are definately flaring up. I was going to buy some wartrol which is like $50 but my cable bill was like $100 which took that money away. I have a perscription for aldara but that stuff is like $130 after insurance, it's supposed to work from the inside out but i never really felt like it did anything. Since I'm not supposed to take suppressants, I figured a natural way would be better. The warts never really bothered me while they were small, but these ones are like a big one here a big one there. They are kind of like skin tags so they aren't that bad, I just don't like them there. I could go to my OB/GYN and have them removed but that's still $20 I don't have right now..... there just isn't enough money to go around....and I need to buy to contacts and stuff on my next check.....but I bought a new comforter set kind of as a present to myself....so I guess I'll have that extra money at the end of the month and I can buy it then. It sucks being broke all the time. The most annoying part of having all this crap I think is how much money I have waisted on trying to get healthy again. Anyway, today has been pretty good.....I took a nap today cuz I had a big lunch and went into a food coma....lol.....I've been able to maintain a normal temperature so I think it will be smooth sailing through the end of step 1......step 2 might me another story but we'll cross that bridge when we get there. I also got a call yesterday from these people who are doing a new reality show. From the same producers as the bachelor and they are doing a new show called "More to Love" it's basically the bachelor but for average people, I guess size 10 and up......they got my info from the bachelor and since I'm a curvy girl they wanted me to submit a tape.....So I put a little something together but I don't know if that's good to represent the curvy women in this world who deserve to find love or if it's tell everyone, hey, I'm too fat to be on the bachelor.....everyone says I should do it so we will see what happens.....my biggest hesistation of course is having these viruses, I don't think that kind of thing goes over very well, and of course am hoping that this detox works and then I won't have to worry about it....but obviously step one is still trying to burn the virus out of my system with this fever....but I've learned to live with it.....I still have pimples and stuff but it's starting to heal which is encouraging. Symptoms I've had today.....

slight fever
fatigue
pimples
short of breath
increased heart rate

nothing too severe, i'm kind of used to it all by now....so things are looking up.....I hope at least...=) well I'm off to bed, a good nights sleep is pretty important...oh also, this stuff really seems to dehydrate you, I think I drank 8 glasses of water at work alone on firday just because I was thirsty. It's good that it's flushing out my system though, and I have had more BM's which is good too....I stopped worrying about what I was eating and more of the fact that I need to eat enough before I take this stuff.... It will be a miracle when this is all over and done with.....well keep your fingers crossed...I'm doing well today, hopefully the days to come will be just as promising....

Day 21

Well, it's been a trying couple of days.....I have been in constant contact with the resolve team and they have reassured me that all my symptoms are normal....I sure don't feel normal....The other day my heart rate got pretty fast and now I don't feel like I have my full lung compacity...They said that if my lungs are detoxing then they might feel different. I'm afraid they are going to fill up with fluid and I'll drown....
I'm finally sleeping through the night, sometimes I still wake up completely soaked and have to change my clothes. This morning my temperature was normal when I woke up.....usually if I start to get the chills I know the fever is coming on. So far I've take 4 ibuprofin for the fever...I don't think it's ever going to go away but I think I can control it at least long enough to go to work and stuff. I'm so glad I didn't start this detox sooner, I would have missed out on so much. If you do this detox, plan to do nothing for the whole 48 days cuz it kicks your butt. Yesterday I got home about 4 and I laid down around 5:30 or so and I woke up at 8, then I fell back asleep and woke up at 10:30 and then got up, took a shower and went back to bed and slept till 5. Even now I still feel tired. I upped my dose to 7ml today, I probably drank at least 7 glasses of water while I was at work today, because I was thirsty....This stuff definately dehydrates you. I haven't heard good things about step 2, that it gives you bad stomach pain. The resolve team told me to make sure to eat and then drink lots of water afterward. I read on another blog that taking beano a half hour before you eat helps and then taking 1 pill during your meal and 1 after.....i'm hoping I will be able to overcome those symptoms....I feel like I have been on this detox for an eternity......Technically I should almost be halfway through expcept that I have to extend step 1....but come this weekend I'll be back on track. I still have half bottles of all three steps, it's not very encouraging when you feel like you're drinking the stuff all the time and it looks like it's at the same level regardless.
I have pimples everywhere....the ones in my armpits and inner thighs are going away but now I have some pimples on my scalp, like in my hair, and I have this massave one on my chin, you know the kind you can't pop, it's super annoying..nothing worse when you look in the mirror and you already feel gross but you look it too. I have developed what looks like a rash on my legs, it's kind of like pimple size dots but it's just red. It doesn't itch or anything, it's almost like heat marks, it's kind of strange, I hope it doesn't develop anywhere else. What's even weirder is that on the fleshy part on my palm just below my thumb there is a red bump about the size of a dime. It's almost like it's infected...it hurts when I press on it, I would have thought it was a spider bite but I have on on my butt as welll...attractive, I know. The resolve team said it could be bacteria that is trapped under the skin that became inflamed or something....I just hope it goes away when this is all over. I can't wait to start feeling better.......
On a separate note, I've been missing my ex BAD.....we broke up almost 2 years ago and although a day doesn't go by that I don't think of him, lately I've just wanted to be in his arms and feel the way I once felt, safe and secure. Instead I feel the way I did when I moved into my apartment. Alone and depressed. Part of me wants company really bad, but I feel like I look disgusting and don't want anyone to see me. I sure hope this works cuz I want to start a new life and finally be happy.....I feel so alone. =( Bottoms up to day 21

Day 18

Well, a lot has happened recently....I have been in constant contact with the resolve team about this fever of mine....They told me to lower my dose until the fever is gone and they said it shouldn't come back. When I told them I had HPV too they said that's probably why I was having the flu like symptoms. I went down to 7ml yesterday and actually slept through the night but right before my alarm went off I had the worse nightmare EVER....and not that the dream was that scary but I was so scared in it. I woke up and my shirt was completely soaked in sweat and so were my sheets, talk about uncomfortable. I had the worst time getting going this morning, but surprisingly had an ok day. When I got home I took ibuprofin for some head pain and my temperature has been normal every since. I did however lower my dose down to 4ml today and I think that really helped. The resolve teal says I can do a day increase at a time and get back on track with my regular doses. They did say not to take any suppressants as it slows down the process, which was interesting because on the website it says that you can take all normal medications as it doesn't interfere. Which sucks since I am also having an outbreak (only my second one ever) and this one is detox enduced and is actually very mild. I already took 2 days worth of suppressant too, wish I knew that sooner. They also said that even though they don't want you taking added vitamin C, it's ok to eat foods that naturally have vitamin C...I've been craving cucumbers and I guess it's ok to eat them, for some reason that just makes food taste better. Everything was so bland for awhile. I'm just hoping that I don't have another nightmare tonight and continue progressing through step one. I have a little more then half a bottle of each step still, 4ml really is not a lot. Just remember that if you do this, 2 things to remember, make sure to eat plenty before you take your doses, and 2, it might be better to do it during the winter cuz you get pimples like crazy and I'm not talking about your face. I have them on my legs and under my arms, like in my armpits of all places. So no tank tops or shorts for awhile. So the symptoms I've experienced so far:

-Sensitive Scalp
-nausea
-fever
-vomiting due to high fever
-nightmares
-fatigue
-sore muscles
-pimples

I haven't really experienced the runny nose or diahrea that people have said they've experienced, but it's only day 18 and I haven't been up past 10ml yet. There's finally starting to be a light at the end of this tunnel. If this works, all these symptoms would have been worth it...so much better than being poked in the vagina with a needle.......read my pre-detox entries if you haven't read that story.......OUCH! ......anyway, I'm off to bed, I'm hoping for the best sleep I've had in days.....wish me luck

Day 15 & 16

Ok, so today is day 16 and I still have a fever. Yesterday I was supposed to sing at a church function. Don't judge me for being a church girl and having HSV and HPV, I had a bad year...Anyway, I committed to doing it and thankfully I was able to keep my temperature normal long enough to go sing and get some things done. That was a relief, I was hoping this would be a new leaf for me and that the fever would go away. Well late last night I was still up and 102 degrees struck again. I can't function when my temperature is that high. Finally i got it under control and went to bed. Of course I woke up with a pretty high temp too. Took my mourning ibuprofin and went back to sleep. I think the worst and most gross part about having a fever is that when you sweat it out your clothes and sheets are all wet. Bleh.....so I figured if I didn't get out of bed my temperature would be all over the board, so I got up and took a warm shower and it felt.....ssooooooo goooooodddd....aaaahhhhh. Just what I needed. It's a little late in the afternoon and I've only taken 1 dose so far which I shoud have taken 2 by now but my schedule is all screwed up. I really hope I can go to work tomorrow, as much I don't want to and would rather stay home and get rid of this temperature I have a feeling it's not leaving anytime soon. Even on a lowered dose, 7ml still brings the fever. That one day I screwed up my dose and ended up throwing it up I actually felt so much better and then I was able to maintain the normal temp. But I can't stop it cuz I'm technically only supposed to have 9 days left of step 1, but the resolve team told me to continue it as normal until it was gone. I still have a little more then half a bottle of A, B, and a little more of C since I lowered my dose. I have been reading other people's blogs and haven't really read anything about people having temperatures but a to of people don't have nasty symptoms until step 2 and 3. So I wonder since I'm having these symptoms now, the resolve team said I shouldn't have many problems after this. Somehow I don't think that's true. But I'm so sick of drinking this stuff I would much rather take pills. My skin has broken out a little bit more and my scalp is pretty sensitive. My tonsils are still swollen but are getting better and my throat only really hurts when my temp is high. Drinking plenty of water is really important. I don't think you could avoid it if you wanted too, your tongue gets so dry you feel like you're in the desert, licking the sand. It's kind of sad when you have your essential items you have to take with you wherever you go, your thermometer, your detox, your ibuprofin and your water.....I have been carrying my thermometer in my purse just in case I start to feel bad I check to see if it's time for more ibuprofin. That seems to be the only thing that really brings my fever down. I should look into something stronger as I'm only allowed to take 6 within 24hours and I took more then that yesterday. well I just took my temp again and it's been a consistent 100.6 for the past 2 hours.....oh well, I guess I'll just monitor is closely. well I'm going to relax, this is more energy then I've had in awhile....I'll keep you updated....

Day 14

Well it's only noon but I didn't write last night cuz I was in so much pain. I've had a 102 fever since I've been on phase 3 of step 1. My chiropractor messed up my back so it's been hurting non stop. The resolve team said it's totally normal and to continue this dose amount or drop down to my previous dose, so I only took 7ml today once I felt good enough to eat something.....my skin has been really sensitive. I got a massage yesterday and I think the increase in blood flow made it worse....my tonsils have been swollen too and I noticed today there are a lot of white spots on them. Which after having read online about all that it says a bacterial and viral infection can't live in high temperatures which is why the detox is causing me to have a fever, and the white spots could be from an infection too, so since this is supposed to be clearing out my system I guess it's presenting itself in odd ways, I haven't had an outbreak or anything. I don't think I have strep throat or anything like that, but since I've been swollowing the minerals I think it's irritating my tonsils. I have been e-mailing the resolve team about it and I guess we will see what they say. This detox is not fun, I think I liked it better when I had no symptoms. I couldn't go to work today cuz I didn't even get comfortable till about 5:30 this morning...It's pretty miserable. I have been reading other blogs and stuff and they say step 2 causes stomach pain. Then some people have said step 3 is really nasty and some say it's a breeze...I'm so over all of this, but it will be worth it if it really works. All my friends think I'm nuts for doing this, but when you get this virus and have to spend $2000 plus on medical treatments and appointments, you'll do whatever it takes to me normal again...pray this doesn't kill me first though.....bleh......